Sometimes I am self-critical for needing to have people around who think the way I do. This implies I might want cloned versions of myself. But this is not true. I have always been sufficiently impressed and interested by those who are my antithesis.

What I do need are people who either agree or disagree with me about things that are in the same zone. I want the company of those who converge on what it is that might be discussed or argued over. What stuff matters, what the issues and values are, these are the things on which it is necessary to have concord.

It's comforting to have agreement and can be challenging to have disagreement. It's simply alienating to be in an environment where you have no feeling at all for the discourse.

After a very promising start in adult life, it has turned out difficult for me to find people whose world-view resonates with mine. I don't want sameness. Differences are fine but they need to be differences within a bigger picture of shared endeavour and common interest.